Trying by Heather MacKinnon

Author:Heather MacKinnon [MacKinnon, Heather]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2018-07-17T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter 19

I stood there staring at my phone for so long the screen went black. And still I couldn’t wrap my brain around what was happening.

Who was that woman in his office? Why was he there so late? Why was he always there so late?

These questions sped through my brain like Indy cars around a racetrack. Though those and a dozen more continued to race, one sat in the center, larger and more imposing than the rest. Impossible to ignore and increasing in size.

Was Bryson having an affair?

A large part of me denied the claim immediately. Bryson had been a faithful partner to me for years and never given any indication that he wanted to stray. We had a loving and respectful relationship that was too strong to allow infidelity.

At least that’s how things used to be.

If I were to give us a progress report on our marriage this past year, I knew I wouldn’t have so many great things to say about it.

We were distant. Cold. Unemotional. We’d grown apart. We’d let the fierce love we felt for each other wither, and as a result, our marriage was basically in name alone. We weren’t a couple, we weren’t partners, we were roommates. With a heavy heart, I realized we weren’t even friends anymore.

I think that one hurt the most.

Bryson’s love and friendship had been the cornerstone of my life for almost a decade and looking back on the past year, I can’t believe how long I’d gone without it.

How had things gotten this bad? How had either of us let our marriage get to this place?

I closed my eyes and shook my head. There wasn’t much I could do about what was happening between us if there was only me here to worry about it. Bryson hadn’t made any effort thus far, and I couldn’t fix us without him.

I walked back into the kitchen and began packing the food away, my appetite suddenly gone. When I was done in there, I went into the living room to watch some tv but found nothing could keep my attention.

I couldn’t stop thinking about the woman’s voice I’d heard and what it could mean. Sure, she could be a legitimate client, but who met with their accountants this late at night? I wanted to believe Bryson, but I also didn’t want to be idealistic.

I tried to look at the situation from an outsider’s perspective and tell myself what I would tell someone else. But, when I looked at the facts, they were bleak at best.

He’d lost interest in me.

He’d pulled away emotionally and physically.

He’d started to work late and on weekends when that never used to be the case.

And I’d heard another woman with him.

None of it looked good.

My teeth began to grind as the facts spun through my brain like a tornado, slapping against the siding of my mind and demanding I see them for what they are.

Something was wrong. It had to be. It all added up, and here I was, the idiot making him his favorite dinner and waiting up for him.

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